When I have the sex talk with my kids I’m just going to tell them to follow the basic rule

“If your age is on the clock, you’re too young for the cock”

yeah, and when my kid turns thirteen imma go,

Sit back down, I was talking about military time.

(Source: jadehanson)

Nothing will ruin your 20’s more than thinking you should have your life together already.
(via suspend)

(Source: cokeinaglassbottle)